Mission to Mars (2000)
reviewed by Brian "the Naked Gun" Felts & Benn "Where's the Humanity?" Farrell

This picture is a very confusing and misguided movie, directed by Brian DePalma and starring such heavy weights as Gary Sinise (Forrest Gump) and Tim Robbins (The Shawshank Redemption). The movie tries to be an adventure/science fiction/comedy and gets lost in its emotional highs and lows. It just ends up being a movie with a few good moments, but overall, it's very bland and uninspiring.

The movie starts of in the year 2020, and the first manned mission to mars is about to take place. We find out that McConnell (Sinise) lost his astronaut wife to cancer, and because of his poor mental stability, he is bumped from the mission for another astronaut, Luke Graham, played by Don Cheadle (Traffic).

Boom! Immediately, we are taken 13 months later, and Graham is leading his team on Mars. I say team, because in "Star Trek" terms, they are all wearing red shirts. Suddenly, they find something mysterious, and all but Graham die. So, a rescue team led by McConnell, Woody (Robbins) and his wife, played by Kim Delaney (TV's CSI: Miami), and comic relief Phil, played by Jerry O'Connell (Scream II). These four go and try to save Graham, and all but one end up stranded with on the planet with him. Then they meet the mysterious alien. Will it eat them or take them home?

I kept thinking this movie was trying to be another "2010." It tried to have all of the same humor and excitement which "2010" had, but it never came close. The ideas presented at the end of the movie are fascinating, but like every fantasy story. It's so amazing, it can't be true.

The story is the weakest element in the movie. It took 20 minutes to get to the movie's conflict and then another hour and a half to solve it.

The only actor who was at all notable was Don Cheadle. I think he is ready to make the next big jump into serious acting, which he gets this year in "Hotel Rwanda." The others could very well have been new actors, but since producers needed to make some of their money back, they asked Robbins and Sinise to take part. Sinise does his standard fine performance, and Robbins is there only for a paycheck and name recognition.

I can't really recommend this movie on any merit. If you have absolutely nothing to do, it's on TV and your DVD player is broken, then you can watch it. Otherwise, if you want to see this movie done better, go rent "2010." It's more enjoyable.

Brian - the Naked Gun

Yeah, this one was pretty much inspiring nausea in me for the majority of its duration. This "Mission to Mars" was definitely a dark corner in the twilight of director Brian De Palma's on again, off again career.

Brian is right again on this one. Academy Award® winner Tim Robbins (Mystic River) appears in the picture, only to get killed stupidly half way through it, before his crew even has a chance to get stranded on Mars. It's like Robbins said, "Sure, I'll take the role, but my character has to be dead by the third reel."

Robbins' character's death was so contrived and weak hearted, it was obvious De Palma was going for something sentimental. These poor actors were trapped in the director's folly.

Gary Sinise is one of my favorite actors of his age group, and I was extremely sorry to see him have to go through the shooting of this picture and a lifeless character. It is obvious, he did all he could with it.

My biggest problem is with the ending. So, humans are actually linked to these Marsians who had to flee their planet cause some meteor hit them. However, for some reason, THIS Marsian telling the three astronauts this story of how humankind came into being, decided to stick behind to...take one home with him?

Why did Gary Sinise character have to go with them? I can understand his character WANTING to go with them; he lost his wife, has nothing to loose. Why not? Why did the alien wait behind for a human specimen? Can we assume Gary Sinise is heading to the Marsians' new home to get his colon probed like every other supposed alien abductee we've heard about?

The story was simply frail, like a 90-year-old man walking across a busy street with his cane. Just kick the cane out from under neath this one, and the whole picture crashes down.

"Mission to Mars" should probably be avoided. I can't think of a single demographic who would find this one appealing on any level. Oh wait, Gary Sinise's character is a widower, so that may please some chicks. As for me, junk it.

Benn - Where's the Humanity?