"White Chicks" is about two inept FBI agents, Kevin and Marcus, played by Sean and Marlon Wayans (TV's The Wayans Brothers), who are assigned to guard two Long Island debutante heiresses, named Brittany and Tiffany, attending some high society fashion event.

On the way there, they foursome have a small car mishap and the girls end up with marks on their face, refusing to show up, but Kevin and Marcus will get fired if they can't get the girls to the event.

So, to save their jobs, Kevin and Marcus parade around impersonating the girls. They have to fool the heiresses' friends and enemies, eventually finding conflict everywhere they turn, especially when Marcus is auctioned off to a large African American man, known for making white girls paraplegic after having sex with them.

There were only two scenes where I laughed out loud. The scene, also in the movie's trailer, where Kevin and Marcus and the girls' three best friends are going shopping, and listening to that song "A Thousand Miles," very suburban. The agents are expected to know, since it is notoriously the debs' favorite tune. Watching them try and fake it was hilarious.

The second big laugh came when the five "girls" were having a sleepover, and one of them breaks out a dildo. Kevin says "Now, that's what I'm talking about," but is soon asked to demonstrate to the other girls how to perform fellatio. Instead, he comes up with a handful of tricks, attempting to avoid putting the tool in his mouth. It was very funny.

However, that's it. The agents, as characters, were very stale. Their motivations were very sketchy, and their inner conflicts were nowhere to be seen.

The only other thing I liked about the picture was how director Keenan Ivory Wayans obviously wanted to spoof the reputations of heiress Paris Hilton and her sister.

The picture's story flops once Kevin and Marcus decided to impersonate the debs. They were simply trying to save their jobs, knowing that other undercover agents they worked with would be there expecting the girls. They didn't do it to flush out any kidnapper, or proves themselves decent agents again, it was to simply save their own asses. The plot was hollow and uninspiring.

Ever since "Scary Movie 2" came out, I suspected Keenan Ivory Wayans talents as a comedy director had been used up. "White Chicks" proves I was right.

It hurts me to say many people may like this picture, but I wouldn't know why. If you're planning to see it, I don't know what to tell you except that it sucks. Believe it or not, "Priscilla: Queen of the Desert" was a more thoughtful drag show, if that's what you're in the mood for.

As for me, the only way I would watch this picture again would be if I ate some spoiled food and used it as an alternative to getting my stomach pumped.