When someone says the phrase "a holiday classic," I never think of that boring ass "It's a Wonderful Life" or that ultra bland "Miracle of Thirty-Fourth Street." Instead, I immediately think of the 1983 now cult classic "A Christmas Story."

"A Christmas Story" is one of the most intelligently told Christmas comedy about a child of the 40's, named Ralphie, hoping, begging, praying for a Red Ryder BB Gun with a compass in the stock and "this thing that tells time."

With that being the major storyline, screenwriter Jean Shepherd, who also wrote the original book titled "In God We Trust, All Others Pay Cash" littered the picture with nostalgic moments of his family, school chums and life in the forties in general.

Peter Billingsley, whose career pretty much died with the 80's, despite having an uncredited appearance in 2003's "Elf," stars amply as Ralphie. His childhood performance is able to suck in all of us who ever wanted ANYTHING for Christmas, which our parents didn't.

Billingsley has a great moment where the stress of home and classroom finally makes him snap and unleash a world of punishment on the local bully Scott Farkas. Ralphie's mother, played by Melinda Dillon (Magnolia, Cowboy Up), soon comes the break the two up and upon seeing his mother, Ralphie is reduced to tears out of shame. The moment was heart breaking and still is everything I watch it.

However, the best performance and most of the film's hilarity comes from Darren McGavin as Mr. Parker, Peter's father. Shepherd's work captures this hard working middle to lower income dad so memorably, Mr. Parker could be considered one of the most flawless characters in cinema history.

Depicted as a brash foul mouthed, wanna-be haggler, led-lamp obsessive father who ends up having the softest heart of the family in Ralphie's eyes come Christmas morning was mastered brilliantly by McGavin. McGavin obviously knew the man Shepherd was describing, maybe his own patriarc, and together they created a truly memorable set of scenes.

As the picture continues outside of Ralphie's home, Shepherd's social commentary and cynicsm of looking back on the 1940's generates much of the picture's humor. From car manufacturing to department store Santa Claus operations, the film gives a little comical poke at everything Christmas and mid-western pop.

Director Bob Clark (Porky's) makes this picture live up to its concrete writing and performances by giving it a style through the eyes of a 12 year old boy. Breaking secret codes given during a "Little Ophan Annie" radio show is shot and edited to appear like the most dramatic and important event EVER. Thus continuously adding to the film's humor. Clark's style is very consistent and dead on for such great material. Unfortunately, Clark's most recent claim to fame is directing the "Baby Geniuses" franchise…uhg, oh, and of course "Halloween 9."

I saw this picture in the cinemas when I was nine years old and it has since kept a very special place in my soul and childhood. Also, that was the year I got my first air rifle for Christmas; definitely a special year for me.

You truly have not experienced the best Christmas themed motion picture in existence if you haven't seen "A Christmas Story." Go rent it. It's hilarious and heart warming all year round

Benn - Where's the Humanity?